WASTED

The plan was to allow myself a good, healthy fortnight to process ALL THE FEELINGS before I blogged about Queer Zine Fest London's hugely successful inaugural bash. But now that the aforementioned measure of time has passed, I find I'm still deep in the throes of emotional recalibration, and I'm not sure I'm able/inclined to articulate how very much the event meant to me just yet. Expect a belated blog post re this at some point in the new year. 

I managed to put together two zines in time for QZFL. The first, WASTED, is a fanzine for the vanished London haunts of my queer youth, featuring illustrations by Michelle Mendonça. The cover photo features M and me in drunken slumber on the night bus. It's one of my favourite photos of us, and was taken during the very early, inebriated days of our courtship. Here's the blurb:

This is a fanzine about the queer haunts of our youth. It’s a love letter to the lost heart of queer London, one that’s been obliterated by Cross Rail expansion, ConDem-led recession and the exodus of queer culture from central to east London. This is a map of the places were we fell in love, the clubs in which we found community, friends and home. This is for all the places that existed before Facebook was a thing, before the smoking ban came into force, for beloved dives in and around Soho, Tottenham Court Road and Leicester Square, a paean to once-thriving queer venues that are no more. 

Paypal £1 and yr addy to charlotte.richardson.andrews@gmail.com and a copy can be yrs!

The second, Why Can't You Draw Something Nice? is a queer art zine by Michelle Mendonça. She's tech challenged, so I handled the grunt work (margin twiddling, layout fiddling, pagination wizardry) and whipped up an intro. M is mega talented, and I think her work will take off in a mighty big way come 2013. WCYDSN? is also £1. Send yr details to raisingrrl81@hotmail.com for the goodies.   

FROM THE BACK OF THE ROOM

Exciting news! I'll be screening Amy Oden's From the Back of the Room, an underground documentary on women in diy punk cultures, on Sun 28th Oct at Shacklewell Arms, E8. Live, post-screening sets courtesy of awesomely brash punk trio Skinny Girl Diet and rad South Ldn punx Woolf. Tickets on the door, and online here: http://www.shacklewellarms.com/listings/eventdetails/28-oct-12-from-the-back-of-the-room-screening-the-shacklewell-arms/

I'm also curating a zine to commemorate the event. Topics: women + punk! Love letters to yr favourite women in punk, constructive critiques on punk scenes/cultures, thoughts on being a female-identified punk etc. Submissions (200 words max for written pieces and/or b&w illustrations, A5 size) should include yr name and any email addy/web site info. Send 'em here: charlotte.richardson.andrews@gmail.com. Deadline: Sun 21st Oct.   



Date: Sunday Oct 28th
Venue: The Shacklewell Arms, 71 Shacklewell Lane, E8 2EB. Tel: 020 7249 0810 Nearest tube Dalston Kingsland
Door tax: £5

https://www.facebook.com/events/402884689767379/

Girls Get Busy zinefest @ The Shacklewell Arms 25.08.12

I've been invited to give a small talk at the Girls Get Busy zinefest, which is happening in conjunction with the Feminist Library's Summer Fete weekend, this coming Saturday at The Shacklewell Arms. A bunch of other rad zinesters will also be in attendance, giving readings, talks and workshops. Its a free event, and runs from 1.00 -5.00 pm. See y'all there.

"I still haven't got a clue what any Breeders songs are about and fuck knows I'm not worrying about it now"

I WAS AT THIS SHOW! H/t to Pamzine #6 for bringing it all back. It was the first (and so far only) time I have borne witness to the awesomeness that is The Breeders live. It was a sticky, overcast day in summer '02, and we got down to the Astoria (RIP) super early to make sure we'd secure a sweet spot front and centre to the stage, all the better to adore the Deal sisters and their glorious garage jams. We were total babydykes at the time, and some of the older lesbians we'd made friends with on the club scene were also queuing. One of them needed to visit the loo, but didn't wanna risk losing her place in the queue. Shamelessly, she stuck her hands into her knickers and pulled out a bloodied tampon, tossing it away down a side street. I remember thinking it was a total show-off move; she was out to wow us babydykes with her radical Jennifer Finch-style cunt politics. We were grossed out and impressed in equal measures, so I suppose it worked. I was told a few years later that her girlfriend at the time of the gig had beaten her regularly during their relationship. I don't know if this was fact or just a nasty rumour, but it was the first time that lesbian domestic violence had entered my consciousness. It sounds naive now, but back then, processing the idea that this kind of abuse wasn't limited to the hetero world was a huuuuge, disturbing headfuck, even if my own dysfunctional background meant I understood the invisibleness that often cloaks domestic violence victims, and the paradoxes that are normally at work, masking everything; how you can be a gutsy, assertive rebelgrrrlhero to your friends and also, away from them, a closet victim, too lacking in strength and self-esteem to exit an abusive relationship/friendship/family dynamic, or ever expect anything better for yourself. I never saw the tampon-missile dyke again, but I remember everything about the gig: how my friend dropped an E and had a panic attack just as The Breeders tore into the opening chords of No Aloha; how I learned to use my arms to protect my ribs from being crushed against the metal barrier when the chorus on Cannon Ball kicked in and the huge, sweaty, heaving crowd behind me surged forward; how I basked in the thrill of pretending I was strong enough to single-handedly withstand that sea of moshing, pogo-ing bodies like some mini Hulk; how I knew all the lyrics, sung (screamed) the loudest and won the coveted set list prize at the end of the show when Kelley Deal instructed the security guard manning the barrier to pass me that magical sheet of crumpled white paper.

2nd International Alt Press Festival

My haul from the Alt Press Fest, which was held at Conway Hall in Holborn this year because its old home, St Aloysius Social Club in Euston, is now a boot camp for young Catholics and trainee priests. 

Required reading for anyone who attends music gigs:

http://www.kathryn-newman.co.uk/index.php?/publications/a-gentlemens-guide-to-gig-etiquette/

Found: Cambodian Grrrl - self publishing in Phnom Penh

Anne Elizabeth Moore is the former co-editor and associate publisher of the now defunct site Punk Planet. Cambodian Grrrl is a diary of her time teaching zine production to a group of young female students at  Cambodia's Euglossa Dormitory for University Women. 

It is a tiny, slim thing, less than 100 pages long, and a heart-breaking account. Moore knows this, and is at pains to sustain a sensible, reportage in the face of the injustice, corruption, beauty and potential she encounters in Phnom Penh. It is fitting then that she owns the power of her encounter, promptly and honestly, at the beginning of the book, when recounting the moment she first introduces herself to the shy Euglossa students. 

"An means to read in Khmer. You will not say this out loud though, point out that you think it is funny that a writer would be named to read, until I put my hands up like a Sampea in front of my eyes, spread them, and pretend to be engrossed in the invisible text written across my palms.

"An," I say. "We will have a relationship based on reading"

And then, finally, you will laugh. And my heart will rend open like a ruby red grapefruit."

It is the closest to indulgent that Moore allows herself to get in an account that is all the more moving for its economy of emotional vernacular, and the encounter captures the shy and tender way Moore and the Cambodian girls go on to negotiate their ensuing relationships, across the divides of culture and language. 

Moore is conscious of her privileges - as a white, 1^st world teacher, as a visitor, and ultimately, as a narrator. It's an account free of the West’s ugly, assumed sympathy-style discourses, and yet, for all her balanced narration, Moore’s love and respect for the Cambodian girls is there, vulnerable and implicit, a careful, complicated and abundant thing free of romanticism. 

There is no great reveal at the end, no gratifying final scene or promise of safety for the girls of Euglossa or their genocide-wracked country, but reading about the simple power of zines, unfolding, in action, in Cambodia, is an aching and radical thing. 

http://www.anneelizabethmoore.com/

Some things you lose, some things you give away

I shredded 6 (nonconsecutive) years worth of diaries today, late 90s/early 00s stuff. It felt liberating to purge all those words. The idea of permanently destroying a diary would have horrified me as a teen.

The gods of lost and found clearly approved, because half an hour later I discovered a cache of unread zines I'd tucked away months ago and promptly lost under the kipple.

NYC 2011, part 2

Pilgrimage picture; I did not stay here.

My hotel was situated on a street full of live/silk flower wholesalers.

 Bird on Broadway

 Fat kitteh at Bleeker Street Records. This should be a prerequisite for every rekid shop.

 Joe Jones, Metal Zitar #4 1971

 Carlita Carvalhosa, Sum of Days  

(Gauze curtain maze, hung with microphones/speakers that record and broadcast the chatter and sounds of passing visitors in MoMa's atrium, layering each day's audio on top of the previous, with the oldest fading to whispers as each day/recording is added)

 Romare Bearden, Jazz II Deluxe 1980

Various, Happylife 2010

 Revital Cohen, Phantom 2010

("A novel peripheral nerve interface allows regenerating axons to grow into microchannels incorporating embedded electrodes. This neural implant enables sensations to be inserted to the device, or for activity to be recorded from movements" which I think translates as 'machine that records the twinges of phantom limbs', yes?

 Johanna Bresnick and Michael Clud Hirschfeld, Mouth To Mouth 2006

(The Torah, administered in pill form)

Prayer Companion, 2010
(In which nuns from Poor Clares at St Joseph's in York recieve prayer prompts from a machine that sources people's feelings, worries and concerns from RSS feeds and global news sites)

 Johan Linden and Olivier Gregoire, Check Mate 2009 

(Sexxxy chess board, complete with "diletto" chess pieces)

 Emily Read and Chen Hsu, Homeless City Guide 2007

 Deana Lawson, Thai 2009

 Newark airport sunrise, around 5 a.m

Homeward bound

Major and micro NYC press.The pink, blue and yellow cover is Gay Genius, a queer anthology. I highly recommend you head here to purchase http://www.sparkplugcomicbooks.com/books/gaygenius/pages/gaygenius.html

Women's Library Zine Fest 25.06.2011

More Crackers Please collage by Bill Savage, which served as the backdrop for the Le Tigre karaoke video Keep On Livin', which I am in for about 3 seconds, looking awkward and ginger. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q0yumFIbq7U&feature=player_embedded

DIY feminist history posters of inspirational women from Shape & Situate zine, #1 and #2, curated by the super lovely Melanie Maddison.

http://remember-who-u-are.blogspot.com/2011/06/shape-situate-posters-of-inspirational.html

 Joana Vasconcelos by Michelle Mendonca, from Shape & Situate #2 http://www.facebook.com/Michelle.R.Mendonca?ref=ts 

Jennifer Maidment's cute, smudgy rendition of me, inked on the day, for Rachel House's Feminist Disco Project (see below for a selection of the in-progress display) http://www.jennifermaidment.com/

Selection from Rachel House's Feminist Disco Project

My haul, including an original 1979 copy of Spare Rib magazine! 

Grrrl talk

This Winter = rad coalescing of femalecentric community magic. Helping out at Ladyfest 10 (go get yr tix!), curating Wears The Trousers's first zine (not to be confused with our propa print editions, but cut-n-paste grrreat nonetheless. Links to follow!), working on proposals for 'women in hip hop' book chapter, helping to plan major cool, international  woman-celebrating events for next Spring - it all feels very fun and promising and important, and especially needed in this crazy Coalition era of economic doom and anxiety about the future.

So, here's my critique of Sara Marcus's book on riot grrrl (Be sure to peep the link to Alison Woolfe's piece of mind) and a review of The Dogbones debut for fans of growly grrrl vox and Queen Adreena-styled UK grunge revival.

Wears The Trouser / Ladyfest 10 zine supreme!

So whilst we're waiting out the 57 years for the gender pay divide to maybe close, girls get busy with independent cultural production! 2010 marks the 10th anniversary of  Ladyfest the international, volunteer-run grrl-franchise that puts women firmly centre stage under a constantly evolving festival banner. To celebrate both this double-digit coming of age and Wears The Trousers own 5th birthday milestone, we think a reader-generated zine is in order.

Though our next official print edition is definitely sailing on the horizon, we’re getting our cut-’n'-paste on in the interim for this one-off project. As a non-profit, independent magazine Wears The Trousers has been blazing our own trail for five years now, and we’d like to extend that DIY spirit to our readers for this super-special zine project. What we’re looking for is anything from 50–200 words about your favourite female-centric band, singer, song or album and why they mean so much to you. Who makes yr heart thump? What were you listening to when you decided to come out to your parent? Which album brings back the rush of first love? Whose poster did you gaze up at during yr teen years? Maybe a particular artist inspired you to pick up your own guitar or microphone, maybe you've got a special anthem that never fails to set you on the right path when it blasts out yr stereo.

Feel free to be as personal as you like!

Whatever your anecdote or story (photographic submissions are also welcome) we wanna hear about it.  We’ll collate everything into a one-off, free-for-all zine that will be distributed at this year’s Ladyfest Ten events in London in November. We’ll also make it available to download. 

Deadline is October 15, so prime yr biro! Email the results to charlotte@wearsthetrousers.com.

ZINES

I realized something ridiculous today. I realized today that I am a writer who has long loved zines but never actually made one. How insanely silly.

This situation clearly needs a remedy.

The type writer is out, the note pad is primed, and I'm nudging the sleepy-head muses awake with promises of fresh, blank pages practically begging for some magic.

Soon come.